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First Laugh

We have all had way worse than that, in the face of something worse.

Some will exclaim that entertainment is not necessary and or potentially ridiculous (in all ways imaginable). This is a debatable subject, only to those who have experienced it AND the truth about recreation; otherwise it is ridiculous in and of itself, all by itself.

“I heard this was awesome!”


That’s right! Aha!

Flocked in herds, preemptively posted up, hiked from miles, hiked in tents, and some with half a lick of sense; there will be humans unified, to be amused.

To watch the greatest show on earth, themselves; with themselves.


We gather together to watch others, or should I say, watch themselves act like others or force others to act like themselves, which would technically be others. What a wicked sense of humor.

The mom’s don’t approve; we must tread carefully not to arouse the dear mother’s greatest fetish of her own!

Never you mind the fathers, if they fathered (of their own free will); they will go and be entertained, without regard for the litter.

Don’t you worry kids! Mommy and Daddy are having a blast!

Sarcasm’s fun too.


Don’t look at an inanimate object like that!


I have warned in the past; the consequences of reading me with that tone!!


No fun for you!

That is sort of fun isn’t it though? (You better answer me!)

There is more to it than just children that get creative in the face of no. Mischief becomes perfected with age, just like the finest variety of existential tricks and traits. Doing “wrong” can be exhilarating. It is not uncommon for a fully mature human to risk and abet personal injury or death; for a laugh. Moreover, the attention and rank establishment in the court of others; peers, predators, and prey.

Unity! “Bring all them muddy fucks in on it!”

I need a ticket too! Don’t forget about the ones you didn’t want or expect to come check out the hubbub! We line up just like everyone else! We get our kicks by watching you, watch….stuff…

OH BOY! (Y’all like that one; me too.)

Let’s all just pile together and watch something…ANYTHING! Don’t you just need; I mean, you can want it too…to just watch stuff. I could watch a crow peck a pear until the jays crash the party.

A party isn’t this; this isn’t a party, don’t you do that to yourself.  THAT is another form of unity.

Not everyone buys those tickets, nor do they receive invites. Doo-doo hazing dearly beloved friends and placing genitals in mashed potatoes is not everyone’s gig.

However, the show; yes, the show must, it must go and on it must go, and on. Additionally the show must go; on.

“Find that dead horse and beat it to death. I have a whole stable of words driven into petrified turds so deep, fly miners need canaries to strike that gold; thems mah finest old, dead nags.

“You’d need coffee filters to sift that shit.”

“They… (remember “them”!? THOSE!)… they say the best part of waking up is a stick stuck up your butt; …hard to enjoy life in that condition, I hear!”

There is an old saying that I just made up, right this very second; it says: “If you do not have the first laugh, than you may end up with the last lash. I am sure about you, but I don’t want to be left out of the joke, just in case you didn’t know about me! Even if I get to eat it. I like the edges of the sandwich, if you want to make me eat like a trucker. I am always hungry, even if it’s your food! Hope everyone gets it!

I guess for pay, I might care less. Oh the might of “might”.

That is usually what ends or starts the fun around here; dockets.

Crunckle, cash; the rags from your uncle, not his bunghole, but his wrinkled ass.

Amuse me already! I am growing impatient!

Who me? No, me? Why, me? Why are we all so inconvenienced by our entertainment?

Like rabid vultures, they come, ripping the eyes from the sockets of humor, joy and amusement. We beg, borrow and steal to be overjoyed; to the point it isn’t funny anymore and the tears hail of a different origin.

“Comfort me! I love the comfort of knowing that I have comfort and being able to find comfort in discomfort; especially that of……NOT ME!” “Don’t cheer me up, just do worse than me!”

Don’t you just love it when I quote imaginary people in my mind?!

This isn’t mine; mind. Mind you; yours. It’s yours. This is a mine of yours.

Sure is.

I brought you here, surely…or unsurely… (hey, look at that! “unsurely” is a word, no shit!)


Nothing brings humies together like a good show; well, there are other things, but for the sake of spotlighting and respectful awareness…you know what I mean…

No you probably do not; that is why my pages have collected so many bored eyes that have wandered so far from their respective heads, suffering endlessly to get a single whiff of a laugh or titillating distraction from things that wouldn’t matter if they were tangible matter.

Not just any laugh; one of a specific, speculative quality, found nowhere else in the billions of educational and thought invoking laughs out there!

Recreational farts; tended by the fertile heart and Fists of the one and only Fartfist…

Around here, we aren’t satisfied with simple chuckles. I advocate strongly for the hearty laugh of tears.

The kind of laugh that would put one in temporary, involuntary stasis.

A laugh so hard, you are tired of it and just want it to fuck off already!

The “wish I had diapers” laugh.

The “my face hurts” haughty hip-slapper.

The chuckle that makes them heckle till their ass hole is tighter than a hackled bass pole.

The laughers are smarter than the rest…


I promise; I laughed first.

If I didn’t than whatever happened was funny, for sure.

If you can’t laugh; it won’t be the last thing you can’t do.

I get the last ice cream sandwich.

Straight faced laughter by FF

Published by Fartfist

I am personally a personal personality for a personable person using this persona.

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