Bewildering Brevity

Welcome to Fartfist’s Bewildering Brevity! The Theme Becomes Apparent… One Title, Two Words  Endless Possibilities. A Different Kind of Magic Gave Birth. A Symphony Of Emotion Imperfect Harmony. Worry Of A Death Live Life. Nine Lives Of Lucky The Cat Tenth Try. Working For The Dead Caught Stealing. Life Of The Gambler Fifteen Minutes. Generation:

Panagraphabet

Apparently all animals and aliens are anthropocentric. Bring back bright, brimming, berry blanketed baskets, boy! Can cars continuously cause certain cancer? Dangerously daft, delusional daring dummies, dash daily during December. Existentiality exits early enough; everyone eats Earth, even extraterrestrials. Fifteen ferrets fly fast for fifty feet, freefalling for five farthings from finicky fans. Great, go

Addicted To Judgment

I am all alone in this world. At least that’s what they imply. Everywhere I go I am judged by others and shunned for my own personal choices and actions. My name is Loquacious Aluicious Broxmeyer. My name is unimportant; please allow me to tell my tale…. It all started at birth! I couldn’t get

Maximum Conviction

It really shows when a person truly wants to do something. You can see from the outcomes. They become rapid and predictable, often productive or entertaining enough to propel the desire to continue. When you spend enough time doing a certain thing, any given thing; you become more proficient and casually execute what would have

Working For Evil

It crawled out of me…each morning. The days, that looked down on me like an insignificant creature. I wrestled it and fought. At least until I won; at the cost of a pack of smokes, my livelihood and a bloodstain on my reputation. There were a few long then, now short years of working towards

A Variety Of Cheeses

What did the tree say to the ground? How should I know? Do you speak tree? What did cat say to the human? It didn’t say a word. That human knows the drill. What did the air say to the wind? Blow me. How many miles can you run? Before or after taking a dump?

Late for Work (The Coffee Is Flowing)

Oh yeah!?? What flavor? Tell me what’chu tryina savor? Tell me what’chu got a taste fer? Sugar? Black gold or Sooty? Dark, bold and Nutty? If ya like it strong, I’ma be ya buddy. I flows like muddy- Water  don’t bother I’ll keep ya runnin’ like the straits of Gibraltar Put it in your face,

The Toy Who Cried, Bored

Long, long ago or five minutes past; lived a boy. Yes, just a boy….and a girl. This child has lived, living and will; a child of your own conception. This boy or girl is whomever you decide you want them to be. The story is for the telling! It matters not what gender this child

Talking In Speeches

Talk to me; tell me what you want to say. We all want to hear it, but don’t want to listen. It never really mattered anyway, so why not just put it in the air? Everyone who can speak and even the ones who can’t or won’t all “have something to say”. You can make

Power Poop Soup

Prepare your senses and control your salivation. You are about to be exposed to and possibly partake in one of the most magical and enriching concoctions conceivable by mankind. The potent prowess of this potion is ~ astounding, breathtaking, captivating, divinizing, empowering, flatulenting, gratifying, habitualizing, inspiring, juxtaposing, kicking, livening, mitigating, notarizing, ostracizing, palatalizing, quenching, reviving,

World’s Richest Cow

COW: Not you again… MAN: Hey Bessie old girl! I have another deal to make…uh…with you…if you’re interested. COW: You better back up… MAN: What, what’s the matter girl? I brought your favorite! COW: Alright, what? What have you got there? How many? MAN: Look, uh… see! Yeah…you know you want some! Yeah, that’s a

Six Billion Disc CD Changer

Being wrong only has consequences when “right” is identified. How many times in your life do you think you missed something? You did. You missed a lot. That’s a fact. It’s an indisputable and infallible fact; one of the kinds of logical certainty that can be achieved without anything at all. This is a fact

Bus Tickets

Oh man! I gotta go get me some more… I wonder…. Shit, I only had the one. I am going to need more, it’s only Tuesday…I ain’t walking all week … “het-eh” Not hap-nin… I’m Cool J out this mutha! “et-eh” *licks lips* Good thing I got those cans up this weekend…I’d be fucked. *bell

Still More Questions

Are answers right? Or do we just become satisfied temporarily? Are the things I was taught as a child wrong? Will the answers always change like this? Is that why we keep asking questions? What is worse? Living in generations of accepted wrong answers? Or trusting that humans get to decide what “right and wrong”

Made In Love

I can’t stop thinking about him. I just met him and I was…it just happened…I don’t know; I have never felt so good in my life. The thrill of meeting, gracelessly bumping teeth as we kissed in the car and holding hands as we walked on the beach. The way he held me; I could